i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Non-Jews are for practice
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
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