well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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