just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Randomize
