Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
