Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize