I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Randomize
