I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
