I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
