i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
