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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize