You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
