YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Randomize