How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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