he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.