Someone shit on the floor
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
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