I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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