Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
