All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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