dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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