We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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