She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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