she looked like the bat from fern gully.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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