I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
