Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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