you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
