I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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