Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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