we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
she smelled like a LAN party
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
