I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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