I'm drive I can fine osifer
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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