Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
