My room smells like vodka and shame
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
