i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize