I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
