No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize