There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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