Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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