Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
