At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
