As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
