I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Someone signed my nipple.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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