so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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