i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
