I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Your penis caused this!
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
