my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
her vagine was all disorganized.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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