he puts the penis in happiness.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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