She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize