I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
