in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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