why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize
